Thursday, April 12, 2012

Opinions & Assholes

It’s true what they say.  Opinions are like assholes.  Everyone has one.   I’ve got no problem with that.  My complaint is that though everyone has an asshole, I don’t want to hear about it, and certainly don’t want to be reminded of it over and over again.  Often times, I feel the same way about opinions.

I recently chatted with a co-worker who said her four year old received this in a birthday party goodie bag.

After confirming that the goodies were not from Amanda Bynes, I quickly launched into a tirade about how I would freak the f-out if my daughter ever received the same.  I would have called the parents, the pre-school teacher and the pediatrician.  Hell, I would have called Dr. Drew.

Come to find out, my co-worker did nothing but throw them away before her child had a chance to see them.  In that moment, I learned she and I were as different as Sandra Dee in the beginning and end of Grease.  I shut my mouth and went back to my office, craving a candy cig and wishing I had shiny pleather spandex.

The next day, my eight year old Rhodesian Ridgeback was diagnosed with cancer.  Having lost our young Rottweiler to cancer just a few months ago, this was another devastating blow.  Heartfelt talk of treatment options became heated debates with tears.  Hours later, I was no more sure if I had made the right decision than Kim Kardashian was when she walked down the aisle.

(What's wrong with this picture?)
Then, just as I had voiced my rage over the poor choice in goodie bag treat, someone voiced rage with regard to my choice of treatment.  And, it wasn’t the wholesome version of Sandra Dee.  Even worse.  It was my sister.

I’ve thought a lot about her opinion since, and why it infuriated me as it did.  Though part of my anger was in her choice of words, part was in hearing someone’s opinion in stark contrast to my own, with regard to something I took so personally.

I have learned a valuable lesson since.  I like to think that I welcome the opinions of others, but have come to learn that I welcome them more when they are somewhat similar to my own.  So yes, opinions are like assholes, and everyone has one.  But there are times that you shouldn’t talk about yours until you are asked to.